February 2012
49 posts
“Roses are red
Violets are blue
Flowers are colored
Other things are too”
The Australian Energy Drink Experience
So this story starts last week. I’ve been participating in research studies and surveys, as my funds have less-than-mysteriously been disappearing. I found an ad which promised $100 for taste-testing an energy drink, this evening I got an e-mail giving me a time and place. I tell my brother, he gives them a call too, and we’re both in. As we’re walking to this address in the...
“No idea how you do it but you’re gross and sweet simultaneously”
– A thought about yours truly…
Dirty Superhero Valentines →
All I want to do is take a picture of this little Asian boy reading a book on chess strategies…but I just don’t have the heart to be seen as creepy AND racist.
“Your lips looked dry while you were sleeping, so I licked them for you.”
– Reddit, What’s The Creepiest Thing a Girl Has Ever Said To You
“I’m not impossible, you have to just get better at being more interesting.”
– Adam Glass
“Oh, I see, your friend is a hobo.”
– Overheard at Starbucks
"When masturbation is outlawed, only outlaws will... →
Air Money
Sometimes I think about my air value. Air value is the amount of money one has from unclaimed checks, day long gigs that went undocumented, waiting stints that were left on bad terms, and government taxes that no one knew existed.
In a backwards sort of way, your ratio of real-life value versus your air value tells you how big of a scumbag you are. Chances are, those with a significant amount...
Listen
“I’m going to get off this train, get myself a beer, and then just DIE. If...”
– Pleasant subway fellow
Sometimes...
Sometimes I think about how amazing it would be to taste chocolate every time I inhaled. Every other breath would be delicious and refreshing and my mouth would always be watering and waiting for a chocolate treat. Then I would slowly start to go mad, because I could never quench my irresistible chocolate urge. Days would melt into each other as every chocolate inhale became the nail in my coffin....
“The People vs. Anne Frank”
– ~movie ideas from my notebook~
“He’s trying to infringe on your right to bust a nut. That’s un-American”
– Nerve.com, Sex Advice From Pot Growers
